Journal of a road trip: Day 2

Day 2: Target is evil
After fighting my husband for a square foot of space on a double size bed for half the night, I finally got smart and moved over to the second bed.  I must say I slept pretty good, considering I wasn't being woken up every hour from being crowded and almost pushed off the side of the bed.  I should be used to this because it is a nightly occurrence even in our king size bed at home. However, since the hotel room is the type with the door on the outside, I woke up around 5:30am and couldn't go back to sleep.  Not to worry, I had to get ready to attend the bridesmaid's luncheon for my cousin.  Then I still had to find a Target to get the wedding gift and get back to the room to get Marcus & me ready for the wedding and reception this evening.  I let Marcus sleep while I started the coffee and perused around on Facebook and news websites and figured I might as well start the day.
Way, way back in my younger, less savory days, there was one particular morning I woke up feeling far from alive and reached for the closest beverage and took a giant gulp...not knowing until it was too late that I grabbed a 1/2 full beer bottle, which had also been used as an ashtray, the night before.  That was probably the single most disgusting thing I have ever tasted...UNTIL I took the first sip of the coffee I just made today..OMG..ewewewew!!!  This was NOT coffee - this was brown putrid liquid.  I'm certainly not a coffee snob and do not "only" drink the Sumatra, triple dark roasted, hand ground gourmet coffee by any means - but again, this was not coffee.  Wait a minute, didn't the lady at the front desk mention a Corner Bakery right by the hotel?  I immediately Google the Tyler location to see what time they open, 6am.  Ok, it's 5:45, I'll go ahead and walk over there and stalk the door until they open.  I may not need the gourmet stuff, but I need coffee!!  I decide I better get a lot because I'm not touching that crap in the hotel again.  Turns out the largest "to go" coffee is a gallon.  Ok, Marcus will drink some and we can warm it up as needed.  We can probably even make it last two days. I pay for my gallon of coffee, slip my credit card and receipt in my back pocket, grab the coffee and condiments and head back to the room with a sense of accomplishment and pride like no other.  I guess my mom taught me good travel techniques!  Plus, after doing the calculations, $18 for a gallon of good coffee actually works out to be cheaper than three trips to Starbucks.  And being such the wonderful wife I am, Marcus doesn't have to subject himself to that heinous hotel coffee.  Good Job, Lara!
Now back to the room and get ready for the luncheon.  I'm all dressed and ready and the guy at Corner bakery told me the luncheon was being held right next to the hotel, within walking distance for sure!  I set out in my pretty new sweater, sleek black skirt and heels to "walk" to this luncheon.  Wait, which way did he say to go?  Fret not, Lara, call your mother for directions.  Which she so patiently tries to give, except being that neither one of us are from Tyler nor do we actually know how to describe buildings or landmarks, causes me to parade around this hotel parking lot.  I can only imagine what I look like, dressed to the nines, arms flailing while having a very animated phone conversation.  I see my sister drive by so I wave her down.  As she pulls  in to the hotel parking lot, my cousin pulls in behind her.  My cousin has so graciously offered to come find me and take me to the luncheon.  What a sweet woman!  I get in and start to talk to her, only to realize we are literally 100 yards from the front of the restaurant and are pulling in to a parking space.  Yep, it was within walking distance and I feel like a complete idiot....but that doesn't deter me one bit when hitching a ride back that same 100 yards to our room with my aunt after the luncheon, which was amazing, btw...
Now it's time to get over to Target to buy the gift.  Marcus is ready to go and we set out on our mission, for the second time, both promising not to fight!  We get to Target, print out the list again.  DAMN IT - someone else has beaten me to the Pyrex!  Ok, ok, I'll get several of the other kitchenware items and a Pyrex pie dish as a substitute.  DAMN IT!  We have a little time to kill and need some things ourselves so we shop for a bit.  We get up to the register to pay and we are asking the clerk if the restaurant next door is good for lunch, which she replies "I think it's quite good, actually."
I get my wallet out of my purse, "Marcus, do you have the credit card?"
"No, why would I have it??"  He's become tired of shopping again and is showing the signs of wanting out of the store.  But we promised not to argue!
"It must be back at the hotel.  I probably set it down on the dresser with the room key and didn't grab it. Would you mind holding our bags for us, so we don't have to shop for everything again?" I ask the clerk.  She tells us she will put our things at the service desk and when we come back we can pay there.
We rush back to the hotel, only having to slam on the brakes once, which of course included Marcus rapidly patting my stomach to "protect" me.  Marcus runs in while I wait in the car...then I start to think "I bet I left the card at the restaurant last night," we were so tired after all.  I run up to the room and tell Marcus and we hop in the car and head over to the restaurant.  I walk in and tell the hostess I think I left my card last night so she goes to get the manager.  Well, the manager comes back to inform me that no credit card has been turned in.  Marcus hears this and I swear I see smoke shoot out of his ears, like on the old cartoons.  He turns on his heel and marches out to the car just as I see the waiter who waited on us last night.  "Excuse me, do you remember me?  We came in just before you closed last night and I asked you to tell the cooks not to spit in our food because we were making them stay late?  You were our waiter, right?"  To which the waiter giggles, "Yes I remember you and I'm sorry but you didn't leave your card here."
Oh this is not good!  How am I going to get the wedding gift now, I say to Marcus as I walk up to him.  I might mention here that he is practically disassembling the Mini Cooper, piece by piece, looking to see if the card might have fallen down between the seats.  "FORGET THE GIFT LARA!!  How are we going to GET HOME???  We have no cash and now we have to cancel the credit card!"  If he could have spit nails, he would have done it right then.  "THINK LARA! When was the last time you used the card?"  he asks.
"The last time was here, at this restaurant, we had already checked in the hotel, so I had already given it to them." I reply.
"Well, it's NOT in the restaurant and it's CLEARLY NOT in the car." he says as he motions to the entire contents of the car now splayed out all over the parking lot.  "How did you pay for the tanker truck load of coffee this morning?"
"OH HOLY HELL!!  The card is in the back pocket of my jeans, back IN THE HOTEL ROOM!" I tell him as we both start gathering our belongings to put back in the car.  Thankfully it's a Mini, so it doesn't take long.  We speed back to the hotel, I run in and grab the card, located right where I said it was.  We both chuckle, thankful that we can now get home without having to borrow from anyone, not to mention continue on with the weekend.
We get to Target, print out yet another copy of the registry, because God forbid, someone buy the items we've selected, causing us to shop all over again...which I assure you, would NOT have been pretty!  All is safe and we pay for our items and sigh with relief.
Remembering the clerk saying the restaurant next door was good, we decided to try it for a late lunch.  We had just spent the past two hours shopping then crusading for the lost credit card, we were hungry!  We are impressed with the cleanliness and quickness with which the we are served.  The menu is lengthy and enticing.  I choose the albacore tuna salad, which claims "chunk, white albacore tuna over a bed of fresh spring greens with cilantro, pico de gallo, fresh sliced avacado and jalapeno and a garlic, jalapeno dressing." oh man, my mouth is watering...this salad sounds DE-LISH!!
"It's going to take a bit for your food, the manager had to reboot the computer system so I have to wait for it to come back up to enter your order." the waiter informs us....and we wait!!
Finally our food comes out!  I'm wishing I had ordered the quesadillas, when I see Marcus' plate.  Man, oh man, this salad is going to rock!!
"WHAT THE F*#% is this???" I practically scream at Marcus...my salad looks like a tuna puked on some coarsely chopped iceberg..there is no cilantro, no other mouthwatering enticements...this seriously looks heinous!
"Babe, I don't think they had to 'reboot' the computer, I think they were stalling while they ran over to Target to buy a can of cat food tuna to throw on some lettuce to pass off as a salad....this is inedible!!" I try to tell Marcus as he is devouring his cheesy goodness in quesadilla form...
"I wouldn't feed that to our cats...that just looks gross.." says my loving husband, between bites.
Ok, I'm not liking this, at all.....I complain to the manager, thankfully after our food was delivered - they didn't have a chance to spit in it!  What pissed me off most of all, the manager didn't blink an eye, he knew what I was complaining about....I will still swear to this day, they were stalling and instead of asking me to make another selection from the menu, they tried to pass off cat food as albacore...with my fine negotiation tactics, my lunch was free....
I watch Marcus finish his late lunch and think "Ok, all we have to do is go back to the room, iron his shirt, get ready and go to the wedding & reception...I got this.."  Day two of our trip and we are still alive and married....but we won't be shopping at Target again anytime soon.  Tomorrow we are planning on shopping at "First Monday" in Canton... (to be continued...)